Aliba D'Rav
  • Home
  • About
  • Contact
  • Weekly Column
  • Politics
  • On being a rabbi
  • THE SIXTY FUND
  • SOMETHING SPECIAL
  • Wisdom Wherever You Find It

weekly column

Each week, find a commentary on something connected to verses of Torah or another source of wisdom

​SAY SOMETHING

9/5/2021

0 Comments

 
Picture

Wisdom Wherever You Find It
 
You’ve got a mouth.  Use it.    Carol Davidson
 
Carol Davidson was my mother-in-law.  She was born and raised in the badlands of New York City and managed to maintain her accent, her elbows, and her pithy observations despite being exiled to Virginia as a young bride.  She was a mere slip of a thing, as much a function of a childhood illness that damaged her heart as anything else. Her face was graced by two distinctive features – a wide smile and a set of very expressive eyebrows, both of which she could deploy effortlessly.
 
In her life, she never used the expression “y’all” nor lost the additional “r” at the end of certain words.  She was adept at finding her way to the head of a line or the front of a crowd, when necessary, with a special affinity for navigating Loehmann’s (which closed at the same time as she died, too perfect to be accidental).  And she had no patience for whining.  If someone had an issue that was generating empty complaints, she had this response:  You’ve got a mouth. Use it.
 
She gave that command to her friends, her children and even her grandchildren.  (She never had to give it to me.) And she took her own advice.
 
At first blush (and because I set it up this way), you might think this is just some sort of New York edginess.  But this piece of wisdom is not some line of dialogue that sounds like it came from “My Cousin Vinny.”  It is, instead, an understanding that words level the playing field.  Spoken or written, eloquently flowing or passionately firing, speaking up is the great equalizer.  Words are power, and power should not be squandered or misused.
 
Carol would not have called herself a Jewish scholar, but her lesson is thoroughly Jewish, even foundational to the Bible.  After all, according to the Book of Genesis, our entire world exists because God has a mouth and used it.  Let there be this, let there be that, let there be these other things and, oh yeah, the humans in God’s image.  The very first action God takes is speaking, and out of that speech everything happened.
 
It doesn’t matter whether you understand that narrative literally or figuratively, it puts using your mouth at the very center of life.  Speak up and create a world.  Stay silent and live in darkness and chaos.  Whine and complain about the way things are and they things will remain the way they are.  Take your issue to the source of the problem and repair the world around you.
 
I’ve been told that I was born talking and haven’t stopped since.  My college roommate once described my course of study in communications as a major in talking.  For me, words come pretty freely.  I expend a few hundred of them like this almost every week.  Not everyone has that proclivity.
 
And, to be sure, there are people who, though they have a mouth, are not always able to use it.  For some, there is a physical impediment.  For some, there are legal impediments.  For some, instead of a bully pulpit, they only have a bully.  But this bit of wisdom is no less important figuratively than it is literally – just like the Bible.
 
Each of us, in our own way, has the capacity to make our circumstances better.  We also have the inclination to accept the status quo as a grievance.  It’s a choice at every step along the way.  Sometimes your voice is spoken and sometimes written and sometimes sung.  Sometimes it is a vote and sometimes a contribution and sometimes an invitation.  Sometimes it is just showing up.
 
Any way you look at it, if you don’t like what’s going on, there isn’t much to be gained by wallowing in misery and muttering about your lot in life.  Arch your eyebrows, smile your widest smile and then – you’ve got a mouth.  Use it.


0 Comments



Leave a Reply.

    Author

    Jack Moline is a rabbi, non-profit exec, and social commentator.  

    Archives

    April 2023
    March 2023
    February 2023
    January 2023
    December 2022
    November 2022
    October 2022
    September 2022
    August 2022
    July 2022
    March 2022
    February 2022
    January 2022
    December 2021
    November 2021
    October 2021
    September 2021
    August 2021
    July 2021
    June 2021
    May 2021
    April 2021
    February 2021
    January 2021
    December 2020
    November 2020
    October 2020
    September 2020
    August 2020
    July 2020
    December 2019
    November 2019
    October 2019
    September 2019
    August 2019
    July 2019
    June 2019
    May 2019
    April 2019
    March 2019
    February 2019
    January 2019
    November 2018
    October 2018
    September 2018
    August 2018
    July 2018
    June 2018
    May 2018
    April 2018
    March 2018
    February 2018
    January 2018
    December 2017
    November 2017
    October 2017
    September 2017
    August 2017
    July 2017
    June 2017
    May 2017
    April 2017
    March 2017
    February 2017
    January 2017
    December 2016
    November 2016
    October 2016
    September 2016
    August 2016
    July 2016
    June 2016

    Categories

    All

    RSS Feed

Powered by Create your own unique website with customizable templates.
  • Home
  • About
  • Contact
  • Weekly Column
  • Politics
  • On being a rabbi
  • THE SIXTY FUND
  • SOMETHING SPECIAL
  • Wisdom Wherever You Find It